Throughout the second semester I have had multiple progression meeting involving both Daniel's Kite and Under the Sun projects.
The key topics considered within these meetings, were how are we as a group going to undertake a task or issue and continue forward to create the films. During pre-production, I had a large amount of meetings with both project groups. Within these meetings my main contribution was talking about cinematography and how we would approach each film to get the best high quality shots possible to help our chances of entering both Daniel's Kite and Under the Sun into festivals.
Even though meetings are helpful, I feel that it is more effective using social networking to discuss work. This is because both groups I worked with seemed more focus when this meeting method. The fact that sites such as Facebook enable to save a post it's a lot easier to see what each member of the group has previously said. It's also the only way to stay in contact on the projects with fellow group members due to it being a 24/7 service.
Feedback from the tutors:
Daniel's Kite Feedback:
For Daniel's Kite, we gained feedback from our project tutor Christopher Cooke. He gave us detailed feedback which has helped us to achieve a high quality final year film.
Here is the feedback that we were given for our assembly cut:
- Good performance from the actor Daniel. That's my first thought. Plus - nice production design for the bedroom - the sound, I imagine will include that warmth/depth, to feel the dialogue is softened by the tent/room and not the studio.
I think the good performance from the actor Daniel, is due to a well organised casting. As a group we were able to find multiple young actors to play Daniel, which enabled us as a group to watch over video submissions for the role to make a group decision to decide who would play Daniel.
- I wish there was a little more light on the fathers face in the bedroom - can this be pulled up/and vignetted in the grade. Especially considering how clean, crisp the wides at the school are.
The lighting for this shot was hard for myself to pull off, I wished I had spent more time on this shot, but due to the limited time in the studio and with actors, we had to continue on with the film shoot. Hopefully this can be saved within post by the editor Nathan Harkin.
- The school gym scene is nicely designed as an edit. Can't wait for the audio to tie this up more completely. I really like the broadness of the PE teacher's performance.
I feel that the group undertook this film shoot well in the gym scene. We were able to spend valuable time on each take and shot as we knew what was needed to be done. This meant editor Nathan, has been able to use this to his advantage to create a very strong and effective scene.
- The history teacher is supposed to be boring - what are you going to do to make it sound/feel duller listening to her? Or isn't it supposed to be boring at all - is it instead fuelling his daydream? Or is he daydreaming because he's bored?
This will be sorted out within the next cut of the edit. I feel that with the music added it will help to show the effectiveness of this scene. The use of tighter cutting will also help to achieve this.
- I wish the wall in the heads office was lit more for that opening track back. I wish his line, "Daniel, How can I..." was over the tracking shot in on Daniel, to tie things up/tighten and overlap things here... careful on the close-up of Daniel that we don't cut off his chin!
Instead of using the opening track shot, we are going to just start on the wide shot of the headmaster's office. We will also not use the close-up shot of Daniel if it cuts off his chin.
- Again, the set design here is very good - be careful when lighting someone against a dark background that we don't lose separation (backlighting!!) from the subject from the wall behind them.
I feel that we should of spent a longer time with lighting for this scene, however due to the green background wall and similar dark colour's matching with the headmaster, it's therefore been hard to light and separate the backlighting from the headmaster due to this.
- The headmaster is fantastically droning! Good work.
I feel that this has been both effective, but also not as effective. It's been effective using this actor, as we have a very intimidating and boring headmaster to make Daniel lose interest. However we may have made it troubling for our actor to learn the lines due to there being so much to say. We ended up cutting the amount of lines per take for the actor to say. But this still may have been too much.
- The cut from Headmaster to Daniel and back before the line about whimsy feels short? Maybe that's sounds issue as the audio drops a little there drawing attention to the length of shot.
For this we can extend the length of the shot and we will sort out the audio in the next cut.
- What is happening during this scene - the head tells him he'll never fly again... that he's attached by a string to a boring, dull system... etc. but it feels long, somehow? It has a great final point: take the string more seriously... but I want to see him torn away - desperate to dream, etc. It just feels like it could be snappier (in my opinion).
For this we will have to cut the scene down dramatically to include key parts of the scene. We don't want it to drag as it will lose the audience's interest within the scene.
- Some nice kite shots - the one before the kite drops to the ground feels a little low...
For this we will get Nathan to replace the shot with a different one.
- The green-screen stuff is coming along - the cut from him lying on the grass to looking like he's stood in front of it is awkward though... something in between? Or music? To solve it...
I feel that the green screen was very effective, as we did this in the studio where the lighting equipment is extremely high quality. The awkward grass shot to green screen can be sorted by the sound.
- The living room is well lit and designed - the sofa and the warmth in light and colour are excellent. Why is he so resistant about a paper round? Maybe if he really is angry he should strop-off to bed faster/sooner?
I feel that this is due to myself and Jay discussing what the main features of the art direction we wanted to focus on in terms of lighting. Jay included a C.T.O (Colour Temperature Orange) gel that would achieve this lighting style once applied with the dedo and kino flo kits. The performance within this sequence will have to be progressed by Nathan on the next cut.
- The bedroom tent, starts to feel like a ritual here - that works well now and builds really well - looking forward to seeing once the green-screen sequence is complete, too.
I feel that this is also due to good art direction from Jay and the help of other members of the group, helping to provide the props and work on set endlessly.
- Slow motion playground, excellent! is disappointment is made concrete.
This was planned out effectively, due to research into using the slow motion sequence. On the shoot day, we were able to frame it perfectly to make the slow motion sequence look very effective.
- So it's nice when his dad shows up - that tension works between dreams crashing to the ground, school being a drag... and then his dad showing up.
This was due to director Chris planning out the script effectively and linking it to the shot list breakdown that I had worked on.
- I'm just not sure of the sequence before he storms to bed - we need to really know how let down he feels.
This will depend on whether we want to keep this shot as a group decision. If not we can narrow down the sequence edit for this shot.
- The release of the kite feels like it needs a shot to follow it?
We can work on this within the edit, and decide whether this will be necessary or not. The feedback given by Chris for the assembly cut will help us to improve our film for the fine cut.
Here is the feeback from Christopher Cooke on the 1st fine cut:
- That's a tight running time at this stage of events - well done.
Nathan has had to work on this considerably since the previous cut.
- I assume this is still early days with audio and this is close to a final cut. It's well paced and looks good.
Luke is working on the sound edit currently.
- The zoom in to the tent in the next bedroom scene is good - but the lighting doesn't match. Sorry.
I think we may take this shot out completely. This may of been due to change in lighting and not white balancing again after the light change.
- The focus shifts are interesting in the next sequence - works well.
Group effort.
- Do we KNOW for certain that the 'searching for kit to wear' is a flash back? How will it be signified? Audio? Edit?
We will show this both through the sound and the edit, to help emphasise the flashback.
- The actor continues to be very good and a good choice. Well directed.
This is due to good casting from the group.
- When he throws the basket ball, the close up of his face doesn't look like he's been moving?
For this we may have to change to a different shot, unless there is a way of showing his movement.
- The balloons sequence is very effective and the fast cut away from the music to the teacher shouting is excellent - more of that!
This is due to both cinematography, editing and sound editing. Luke, Nathan and myself have worked well here.
- The squeaky pen in the classroom continues to work. She's very droning, too. Is Henry really fidgeting - he doesn't react much?
I don't think we have a reaction shot of Henry, but he's not important within this scene and doesn't need recognition. When it shows the children after the teacher says that, the point is he has stopped fidgeting by then.
- The echoing audio here is very god too - more audio signifiers will work well to take us into his world of imagination. It reminds me of a seventies film (mixing live action and cartoon) called The Phantom Toll Booth.
Luke has worked well here on the sound, and he will continue to improve it by the next cut.
- Looking down at his desk - I am starting to be convinced - I just wish there was better visual continuity and we'd seen something of the top of his desk.
This is due to us rushing the shoot for this scene. As having to deal with kids, it's very hard to keep them focused. Therefore we rushed to get it done as we didn't want the kids to lose interest.
- I get the idea that the head asks him to imagine he's a kite and the school is the string - let go of that and you will never succeed. It's a strange thing to say and works to portray the head master as a strange man. Good.
This is due to the performance from our headmaster as well as director Chris Kenward guiding his performance.
- BUT - I wish we were more aware of his love of his kite earlier or more often throughout. Maybe pre-opening title? It's something he takes to school after all... But that's wishes for you! But it is important to his character - it represent him and he wants to be out flying the kite with his dad... this needs building.
We will have to see what we can do in the next edit for this, as we do not have that many other shots of Daniel with his kite.
- Why didn't his dad meet him after school the first time?
This is because his dad forgot to go due to work. Showing he doesn't think about Daniel.
- You do well during the conversation on the sofa to show his disappointment - but maybe this could be paced tighter to really highlight that beat: he's disappointed with his father, he feels let down. Ideally he'd be seen consciously taking the kite into school every day... then being disappointed... then NOT taking it in... so that his dad, finally, meets him, bringing it in for him... So instead this has to be 'shown' and implied more.
We will have to see what can be done to this within the edit. As previously said, we do not have that many shots of Daniel with the kite.
- Is there a wide shot of his dad arriving at school with the kite?
We were unable to get this, as we didn't want to show the surroundings of the location where we filmed. We thought it would look to modern and therefore stuck to tightly framed shots.
- He doesn't seem to have run in to shot from very far... we need footsteps heard a beat longer before he arrives in frame.
Sound editor Luke will sort out the sound for this, ready for the next fine cut.
- The room tones are distracting and I know there's a lot to do - will dialogue be going in soon?
This will be sorted out when the external sound recordings go into the scene.
- Never the less - this is a tight cut, there's some good rhythms in here and the performances are sincere and strong- the school stuff is striking and there's a solid story.
This is due to a group effort and everyone working together well. The mentioned comments from Chris should help us to achieve a better quality film if we undertake his considerations of what to improve or change.
Here is Chris Hall's Feedback on the 1st fine cut from the screening:
- Need to sort out opening shot (Shitty dedo shot).
We are going to get rid of this shot, as the lighting does not match the way we wanted it to. This is most likely due to not white balancing after we changed the lighting in the studio.
- Cut out line 'You know I've got to work Daniel' and instead cut to sigh.
This will be done for the next fine cut of the film.
- Flashback sequence works better now its shorter, doesn't disrupt the pace.
This is due to Nathan working hard to fine cut this scene.
- Composite Parents out of shot in background of kids.
Nathan will fix this within post, ready for the next fine cut.
- Transition between Gym and class room, cut out black and go straight to track.
This will hopefully help cut down running time due to getting rid of the cut out from black.
- Bring in music earlier when Daniel is falling asleep in the classroom.
Luke will include this within the next fine cut.
- Hold 'Bugger' shot longer and bring in Headmaster dialogue underneath that shot.
Nathan will include this within the next fine cut.
- After kite shots, cut back to Daniel looking down then back to the Headmaster. Bring music under kite shot in headmaster scene to cover up performance (Reverbed).
Nathan will sort out this issue, ready for the next fine cut.
- Try and use a different take on 'Night Danny.'
We will have to see what other takes we have that can solve this.
- Needs music under the last scene, feels empty and should build up tension to cutting of the string.
Luke will work on the sound edit, ready for the next fine cut. We may have to do some of our own sounds recording's for the music.
- Lose 'Daniels Kite' Title at the end and cut straight into Kenward's name (don't know why we would want to do that but oh well).
Nathan will change this within the next fine cut edit.
- Make titles shorter for screening.
Nathan will change this within the next fine cut edit.
The feedback we have received for Daniel's Kite will help us to ensure we make the best film possible, that can be entered into future film festivals.
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